2011 Occasional Posts

Passages


My best friend’s father died earlier this week.  Their relationship was tumultuous (read: understatement of the year) but still, she grieves.

My mother is rapidly joining the ranks of living hell as her mind slips away but her body keeps kicking.

Jim made all the difference in the world when we launched free Shakespeare in the Park last year.  In the midst of uncertainty and tumult, he was there and a constant reminder of the love that brought us there.  Jim needs to be elsewhere this year and I miss him already.

These separations, whether they are permanent, inevitable or temporary, are hard.  I am surprised when I start crying ‘for no reason’  until I realize that I’m mourning.

My best friend needs to cry so that eventually she can stop.  I need to go ahead and feel the pain for my mom so that I can get it out of the way and try to figure out how to help.  I need to miss Jim so that I can pick up and keep going in his honor.

This is the way of things and I wouldn’t change it.

Significantly,

Susan Scot Fry

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2 thoughts on “Passages

    1. Thank you, Margherita.

      To answer your question – I was talking to my friend about her father’s death. It made me think of how my mother’s mind is dying – she’s in final stages of dementia now. The same day, a man I worked with told me that he needed to do less. All these transitions all at once struck me. Passages. They happen. They are a natural part of our life cycle. I feel that I needed to acknowledge and to appreciate that. Some passages are painful. But that doesn’t stop them from being necessary and inevitable. I’m good with that.

      I hope that helps explain what I was thinking. Thank you again for the compliment.

      Susan

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