Aha moments aren’t always pleasant, but they are illuminating.
There’s been something really bugging me about the meeting I’m going to today and I figured out what it is. It’s me. It’s my attitude. I realized that what I’d written yesterday wasn’t clever, it was sarcastic and defensive. The energy didn’t sit right and alarm bells have been ringing. One just clanged me in the head.
It’s common to try to control a situation by marginalizing the participants. People do it all the time. It’s one of the coping mechanisms we’re taught in the land of low self-esteem. It’s an extreme variation of imagining my audience in their underwear. If they’re silly, they’re less frightening. It’s also a sign that my head isn’t in the right place.
I am not like that. I believe in people. I believe in believing in people.
Expectations are a self-fulfilling prophecy. Expect the worst and guess what? Expect the best and it will happen.
I’ve written about this before. It’s not some mystical, magical phenomena. If I’m positive about myself, about these people and about what I’m talking about, no matter what we all win. They may or may not find an interest in the idea that I’m pitching but the experience of talking to me about it will be good. It will also be funny and my enthusiasm will be infectious. That’s who I am. The love comes through.
Sometimes delivered like a bull in a china shop, but hey maybe the little tinkler on the door was the bell that hit me in the head.
Susan Scot Fry